If you look at your life, you’ll notice certain tendencies. You’ll enjoy certain types of people and not care for others. You will find each other, begin a relationship, run into certain kinds of issues, not enjoy them as much, eventually let them go or simply let the relationship drift away. These can run a bit different given the type of relationships but all-in-all, many find they all run together. Let’s look at a system that may help you with your relationship blocks. I recently spent a week with Anthony Robbins and I have incorporated many of his main suggestions. Talk these points over with those you love and take you relationship and your life to the next level.
Taking a Closer Look at Your Current Relationship
What kind of relationship do we really want? How’s your relationship now? Where are the gaps? This may be a conversation you have avoided - and yes this would be one of the reasons your relationships end up with very similar results.
Why did you get into this relationship? Why are you in it now? What do you want from this relationship long term? We change over time and our relationships must accommodate these changes. You need to ask yourselves, “Who am I?” and “What do I need?”
What season is the relationship in? Every relationship has seasons. What season is this relationship in? Spring, Summer, Fall or Winter? Each season comes with its own opportunities and being able to predict these opportunities can prevent what otherwise could present problems. How can you both prepare for the next season?
Identifying and Overcoming Relationship Blocks
What is next for your relationship? Create a compelling future and execute your plan effectively. Assess, decide, engage and integrate your plan into your daily life. Allow your plan to have several “out of the box” aspects that you both will enjoy. Include rewards along the way. This helps to maintain personal passion and motivation for your relationship and what you each want.
How will each of you integrate and innovate into new your life/relationship? Yes, this is a new life. We are throwing your old ways out, like clothing that no longer fits you! How will you assess each morning another way to add value to the relationship through something your do, showing you care or delivering that message in a novel way?
Each of you must know who your partner is, who they need to be, what they value, need, want and what will fulfill them. Look at each of their relationships. What strengths are crying out to be noticed, enjoyed and appreciated even more? How can inserting this add even more value to your relationship?
What are the primary gifts and strengths you bring to the relationship? How can you deliver these strengths in a fuller, richer way, every day? How can you communicate the joy you feel sharing these strengths better? How can you then share with them how much you appreciate the central values you bring to the earth?
How can you each allow others to see the special ways of your relationship? This creates a desire for others to engage with you both in this very special relationship.
Meeting Needs and Facing Challenges
You must become an expert at meeting each other’s needs. Hearing objections as opportunities, engaging in discussions as a team, avoiding blame by framing conversations carefully. Work with each other in ways that produce the expectation of superlative results.
Choose other relationships that surround this relationship carefully. Let them know of your expectations and how these relationships must serve you and your primary relationship. You may need to remind them, e.g. when they ask you to go out partying with them again. Inspire and reward these relationships as well while being clear with them. Talk with them frequently about shared life goals and how to make these relationships even better.
Anticipate and prepare for the physical and financial ups and downs of life. There will be “winter seasons”. How will you prepare for, mitigate against and even take advantage of such times?
Constantly look to optimize and maximize your relationship. What have you experienced to be the key motivators for each of you? How can you add even more value to the relationship? How might it be measured? Who will be involved in these efforts? How can you routinize these efforts into your daily life? How can you surround yourself with others who live their life in this way?
Finally, always look for ways to exceed each other’s expectations. Give each other more than they ask for. Give them what they truly need particularly as it relates to your unique gifts. This will produce greater results for them, for you and for your world.
This process will allow future “problems” and past relationship blocks to become fuel for even greater opportunities.
To find more ways to turn problems into opportunities in all of your relationships, sign up risk free for the Grow in Oneness course or Heal in Oneness course. You can also discover amazing tools for building up your relationships by listening to episodes of the Oneness Approach podcast.